It might sound harsh to say 'Don't date somebody with depression,' but Madeleine has both been there herself and lived with somebody who was depressed, and in her words 'It sucks'.
She says, 'I'm not saying that depression doesn't deserve empathy and I'm certainly not advocating you ditch a partner who finds himself depressed. In fact it's at times like those that he'll need you the most, but there's a big difference between dating someone who becomes depressed and choosing to date somebody who is already in the dark depths of depression from the outset.'
She goes on, 'Depression is an incredibly frustrating disease, unlike any other ailment, depression gets to the very heart of who you are. It skews your perspective of the world, making everything seem bleak, difficult or hopeless. But most of all, it makes you incredibly selfish.
'Your mind is constantly occupied with your own thoughts and doubts. Other people in your life become secondary to the depression because you feel so overwhelmed by its power. There's no cheering up to be done. There's no pulling yourself together.'
'Some women are drawn to depressives because they seem so dark and mysterious,' she explains, 'Women want to mother them, take care of them, cheer them up. Perhaps I can reach him? Maybe all he needs is a good listener?' Maybe I'll be the one to make him happy when all other women have failed? Perhaps you will. But it's a huge risk and are you sure you want to take it?'
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