To: Kiran Bawa; Raveena Tandon

Dear Kiran and Raveena,

Allow us to address you individually, in alphabetical order.

Kiran: what the hell woman? Why are you dressed like you parachuted off a plane in a pink parachute with rhinestones, got entangled in the parachute and rushed to an event showcasing your jewellery? You seem like a lovely person and we don't mean to be rude, but that caftan's making you look three times your actual size. And we're sure you agree when we say that nobody needs that!

Raveena: We're afraid that you may be beyond minor reproach and helpful hints from us. We would love to throw you in solitary confinement for a night or two, so you can think about what you've done (A midriff baring top held together with a giant ring? No Raveena, NO!) It's just that we don't think that'll have any effect.

For the love of fashion, please hire a stylist. And please, please contact Sonu Niigaam. He's been asked to look for hair dressers and if you guys live in the same area, maybe you could go to the same salon.

Concerned,
IG - Fashion Police